Hello I have just joined the community and I’m hoping I can find an answer to a problem I have with my beautiful girl Sadie .We rescued her when she was 3 months old she had lived on a farm was not fed regularly and had not been handled at all .So when Sadie came to live with us she was a terrible bag of nerves, her one biggest fear is hands and still is . We have had her for nearly 3 yrs and she has come a long long way , I watch all the videos on how to tell if your cat is happy ect and she ticks all the boxes ,wrapping round our legs throwing herself down and rolling exposing her belly everything except being able to touch her .
As soon as she sees a hand she lashes out and is terrified I’ve tried to hold out a closed fist but she just attacks it .I’m sure she would love some human contact as we would love to cuddle her but we realise it has to be on her terms. To me it seems like she doesn’t make the connection of the kindness we give her ie feeding, playing , hanging out together with having a nice stroke.It’s like there is a blockage there , will it just be a case of more time or is there something else we could do ? I would be very grateful for any suggestions . Many thanks Andrea
Hi Andrea,
Thank you so much for being part of the community and reaching out.
Does she accept or enjoy brushing by any chance? I am currently using brushing as a technique to teach my client’s stray cat to get used to being touched and handled.
You can start brushing Sadie with a toothbrush, transition to a soft, slicker brush, and alternate with one brush and one body stroke on her head only.
Otherwise, distract her with a toy or food while reaching your hand behind her head or neck to touch her. Avoid touching other areas until she is entirely comfortable. Once she enjoys being touched on different areas of her body, you can try picking the front part of her body.
Lastly, try clicker training using food or toys. Clicker training reinforces the human-animal bond, which can reduce fear and provide better social and husbandry care for Sadie.
I hope the above are a few examples you can try this month.
Have a wonderful Sunday!
@melina-grin Thank you Melinda for your reply and advice !some good things to try out , I forgot to mention that Sadie loves to lick the foil tops off yogurt pots and while I’m holding it for her I stroke the top of her head with one finger and that is no problem to her but when she realises what I’m doing that’s when she dabs me , it’s very strange. I am definitely going to try with a toothbrush.
Many thanks Andrea
Hey Andrea, it sounds like you've done an amazing job helping Sadie come out of her shell after having a rough start in life. It's great that she's settled in so well and shows she's happy in all the usual cat ways, minus the touching. Don't lose hope though, she may still warm up to human contact with more time and positive experiences!
Since she was abused as a kitten, Sadie likely associates hands with fear and pain initially. But hands also do all the good things for her now like feeding, toys, and care. She just needs help making the connection that hands bring all these great things, not just scary stuff.
I'd say keeping up the slow, gradual efforts you're doing is the way to go. Try offering treats or wet food from your hand so she associates it with rewards. Get down on her level when interacting. Avoid direct approaches and let her initiate any contact, even just sniffing your hand. She may take little steps like rubbing her face on you. Celebrate any progress!
With her background, Sadie may always be wary of petting. But trust and comfort levels can keep increasing with your patience. One day she may surprise you by hopping on your lap or nudging your hand for a quick pet. Just go at her pace and give all the love you can without touch. You're her hero for helping her blossom!